Carried: Cheek Problems
“There's a low shame in me about who and what I am that follows me everywhere.”
It shows up as a free-floating shame about one's very being, a diffuse sense of I-suck that attaches to who and what one is, tangled with conflict about self-expression and one's own emotional reactivity. The shame has no single cause it can point to; it just is. It was generated by a denigrating, wrong-making family who were alarmed by who the person was. What it asks for is one experience of being met, as oneself, without the flinch.
The ugly duckling, made to feel wrong and unwelcome for a nature the barnyard was simply alarmed by, ashamed of a self that was never the problem. The form implies a task: to be met by those who are not alarmed by what one is.
- Essence
- Wrong at the Root
- Rule
- There's something shameful in who and what I am, and it follows me everywhere.
- Body zone
- The cheeks; the face's flush of shame at one's own nature
- Archetype
- The Ugly Duckling
- Emotional theme
- A free-floating shame about one's very being
- Behavioural pattern
- Diffuse shame about who and what one is; conflict about self-expression
- Family dynamic
- A denigrating, wrong-making family alarmed by who the person was
- Core wound
- There's something shameful in who and what I am, and it follows me everywhere.
- Exit
- One experience of being met, as oneself, without the flinch.
What is the "Carried: Cheek Problems" pattern?
It shows up as a free-floating shame about one's very being, a diffuse sense of I-suck that attaches to who and what one is, tangled with conflict about self-expression and one's own emotional reactivity. The shame has no single cause it can point to; it just is. It was generated by a denigrating, wrong-making family who were alarmed by who the person was. What it asks for is one experience of being met, as oneself, without the flinch.
What does "Carried: Cheek Problems" sound like when it shows up?
There's a low shame in me about who and what I am that follows me everywhere.
What is the archetypal form of "Carried: Cheek Problems"?
The ugly duckling, made to feel wrong and unwelcome for a nature the barnyard was simply alarmed by, ashamed of a self that was never the problem. The form implies a task: to be met by those who are not alarmed by what one is.
This is a pattern. Not a verdict.
It appears in many lives.
Decoded2times