Pushed away: Mandrake
“Wanting things is what got me into trouble, so I stopped doing it.”
It deprives itself in two registers at once, of plenty and of desire, treating both as a single appetite that has been established as shameful and is therefore not fed. It grew up in a household that shamed and deprived, and in some cases took what was not offered, which is the arrangement most likely to produce a person who handles their own wanting as contraband. What it asks for is one want acknowledged in private, before any question arises of acting on it.
It echoes the Handless Maiden, whose hands were given away in a bargain she was not party to, and who went into the forest afterwards unable to take anything for herself, however freely it was offered. The form implies a task: to hold something with the arms that are still there.
- Essence
- The Misplaced Shame
- Rule
- What I wanted was made into the thing that was wrong with me.
- Substance / Activity
- Mandrake
- Archetype
- The Handless Maiden
- Emotional theme
- Wanting itself established as shameful
- Behavioural pattern
- Systematic abundance-avoidance and deflection of sexuality
- Family dynamic
- Shame-inducing, depriving and in some cases sexually exploitative family
- Core wound
- What I wanted was made into the thing that was wrong with me.
- Exit
- Acknowledging one want in private, before any question of acting on it.
What is the "Pushed away: Mandrake" pattern?
It deprives itself in two registers at once, of plenty and of desire, treating both as a single appetite that has been established as shameful and is therefore not fed. It grew up in a household that shamed and deprived, and in some cases took what was not offered, which is the arrangement most likely to produce a person who handles their own wanting as contraband. What it asks for is one want acknowledged in private, before any question arises of acting on it.
What does "Pushed away: Mandrake" sound like when it shows up?
Wanting things is what got me into trouble, so I stopped doing it.
What is the archetypal form of "Pushed away: Mandrake"?
It echoes the Handless Maiden, whose hands were given away in a bargain she was not party to, and who went into the forest afterwards unable to take anything for herself, however freely it was offered. The form implies a task: to hold something with the arms that are still there.
This is a pattern. Not a verdict.
It appears in many lives.
Decoded4times